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Eclipse in Fifteen Minutes - Eclipse in Fifteen Minutes - Movies in Fifteen Minutes Page 6 — LiveJournal
This is, after all, what happens when you cross the streams.
Eclipse in Fifteen Minutes
Previously on ~*The Twilight Saga*~:

Twilight in Fifteen Minutes
New Moon in Fifteen Minutes
Recap: The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner
Many other recaps

So... I got a little loopy on this one. Enjoy.


Site Meter (Zomg e-book! The Annotated Movies in Fifteen Minutes: Wizards!)

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Current Music: Howard Shore - "Rosalie" (SERIOUSLY, HOWARD SHORE)

312 comments or Leave a comment
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cherrysakura5 From: cherrysakura5 Date: July 13th, 2010 09:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
I was the youngest major on the Starship Enterprise in the Confederate Army

When Jasper said this line in the movie, I remembered this same joke from your eclipse recap.
I started to laugh uncontrollably in the theater to the point where I got a few angry glances and weird looks in the dark.
It was worth it.
theantijoss From: theantijoss Date: July 13th, 2010 09:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
BWAH! I so look forward to these! Love how you covered that crappy tacked on pseudo-feminist girl power bunk at the end.
lilgoala From: lilgoala Date: July 14th, 2010 01:33 am (UTC) (Link)
Heh, I transposed that as tacky crapped on.
From: not_sally Date: July 13th, 2010 09:34 pm (UTC) (Link)
Finally my reason for having watched this movie arrived!
And lo, it was good.
emoui From: emoui Date: July 13th, 2010 09:38 pm (UTC) (Link)
Totally worth the 13 day wait! I love it!
From: elbales Date: July 13th, 2010 09:42 pm (UTC) (Link)

Girl, you can M15M while drunk any time. Where shall I have the booze shipped to?

In conclusion: Genius!

p.s. The whole thing was genius, but for some reason "My hand to God" made me laugh uncontrollably. FTW.

Edited at 2010-07-13 09:49 pm (UTC)
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: July 13th, 2010 09:54 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heh, thanks. I really am starting to think that it took me 13 days because I was sober for the first 11.
an_lagat_glas From: an_lagat_glas Date: July 13th, 2010 09:44 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hahaha, this was excellent! I loved the references to what actually happened in the book. Gotta say though--the Victorian translations of sagas you can find online are really, really bad. Saga style is actuallyway more simple.

Also, I have no idea why I laughed as much as I did at 'polyblennnnnnd' : D
speakred From: speakred Date: July 13th, 2010 09:49 pm (UTC) (Link)


I'm not gonna lie. I've been waiting for this for.

opportunemoment From: opportunemoment Date: July 13th, 2010 09:51 pm (UTC) (Link)
YES. The Vikings were perfect and I laughed SO HARD at the Braaaaandooooo/Deeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaan bit. Awesome. :D
(Deleted comment)
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: July 15th, 2010 08:04 pm (UTC) (Link)


Wait, they're doing what now?
last_archangel From: last_archangel Date: July 13th, 2010 09:57 pm (UTC) (Link)
.......Cheeseburger of pain?
From: redcurrantbasil Date: July 16th, 2010 04:14 am (UTC) (Link)
Stephenie Meyer actually wrote that. In a completely serious manner.In her new 'The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner' novella.
chulacabra From: chulacabra Date: July 13th, 2010 09:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
I got to the end of the recap and the ad at the bottom had a picture of a ginormous pregnant belly. Hand to God. It scared the shit out of me. It was like HERE'S WHAT'S COMING NEXT. BOO!!!
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: July 13th, 2010 10:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh dear God. I've never seen ads on LJ, because I've had a permanent account for a few years now. Holy crap.
hkmmurph From: hkmmurph Date: July 13th, 2010 09:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
JASPER: Oh... that’s just precious.

I read that in a female southern accent. Specifically the one women over forty use to say 'Bless your heart'. Hee.

Hipsters go flying, and are too busy dying to notice that Victoria and Riley have left them high and shiny.

Hipster vampire massacre? You just made this move 10x better

Hipster!Vamp: Oh, I'm only a vampire ironically. I eat people only if they're organic and-
starlady42 From: starlady42 Date: July 13th, 2010 10:09 pm (UTC) (Link)

It's all about denim this summer!

I DIED. Hilarious!
cho_malfoy From: cho_malfoy Date: July 13th, 2010 10:10 pm (UTC) (Link)

Genius, the whole way through.
cmdr_zoom From: cmdr_zoom Date: July 13th, 2010 10:11 pm (UTC) (Link)
Like you, Cleo, I am firmly on Team Alice. And you say that in this one, she gets to be undiluted awesome and even take down Jasper Compton Leghorn Cullen with a sparklesmooch? Dang. Now I wanna see that.

Too many other brilliantly funny lines to quote, so I'm giving up here and will just applaud.
312 comments or Leave a comment
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