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Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes - Movies in Fifteen Minutes Page 25
This is, after all, what happens when you cross the streams.
Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes

As promised: Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes. I'm still counting up the fundraising, but we'll have a final count soon. I'm already running late with the book manuscript, but this was a very quick write--it practically parodies itself, and it was fun, and a good palate cleanser.

ETA 4/02/05: Okay. I'm gonna try to be real clear about this. I really, really liked the movie. I liked the book. I have never seen the show, but I would probably like it, and I ended up really enjoying the music. I like the actors involved. PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE ME COMMENTS ABOUT MY "HATE" FOR THE MOVIE. The point of these parodies is "affectionate snark." The jokes are written with love. If I hated the movie, I wouldn't bother. If you think I'm not funny, that's one thing, but please don't leave me long screeds about how I didn't "understand" or "appreciate" the movie, because you're preaching to the choir. (Yes, I have received, and am still receiving, a lot of these. Two today alone, in fact.)

P.S. Please look up the difference between "heroin" and "heroine" before you complain about my "Heroine Addict" icons. It's a pun. It's supposed to be a positive thing. I'm not calling anyone a drug user. Thank you, and enjoy.

Oh, and since it always comes up: I never have a problem with anyone leaving comments. In fact, if you'd like, you can leave them in the comments for me to see. But please don't copy or repost the entire thing anywhere; excerpts and links are always fine, though.

ETA: Minor corrections have been made to dates and a couple of names.


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colormeindark From: colormeindark Date: January 13th, 2005 06:00 am (UTC) (Link)
...that was BEYOND hilarious. You are a genius. I love you forever. And you're awesome, for the mere fact that you mention the Persian.
From: frenchhorngal85 Date: January 13th, 2005 06:05 am (UTC) (Link)
So many comments on this, yet i don't want to read them, but BRILLANT!!!!! Simply OUTSTANDING!!! I loved it, laughed my ass off, esp. "CHRISTINE: But—well, there he goes. Well, what should I wear for dinner? I know—a dressing gown that shows off my new lace garters!" HOW TRUE! lol i wondered about that whenever i saw Phantom for the first time. Once again, that was GREAT! thank you!!!
amyleefanatic From: amyleefanatic Date: January 13th, 2005 06:18 am (UTC) (Link)
missing hanson brother..ahhahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
bakapikananoda From: bakapikananoda Date: January 13th, 2005 07:37 am (UTC) (Link)
i laughed so hard i not only cried but woke up my father who was wondering what had made me so 'upset'. its so great! thanks for posting it!
From: nae_trews Date: January 13th, 2005 08:14 am (UTC) (Link)
I've been meaning to leave a comment ever since this was posted, but .... meh. I'm lazy.

But really - you summed up all of my thoughts in regards to this movie in this m15m entry and your actual review. So you rock ass hardcore, man ... for lack of better phrasing. And there were references to the book! Huzzah. I'm a "book!Phan," but I do like the ALW musical because I derive so much terrible gratification from its complete and utter silliness - which was only magnified a 100x more by the movie. I think I completely lost it too when I first saw the title song in theaters. So much 80s cum Meatloaf cheese and gratuitous Cocteau thievery! I went into overload.

And the Dread Pirate Roberts Corps de Ballet has had me laughing all week. <3
snarkitty From: snarkitty Date: January 13th, 2005 09:54 am (UTC) (Link)
You already have about 8594354930543 comments, but:

This is absolutely hilarious. It made me laugh out loud! Le gasp ;)

assassinofjoy From: assassinofjoy Date: January 13th, 2005 10:53 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh dear *giggles like a freshman after her first joint* Hilarious -- haven't laughed that much since Lord of the Rings (in fifteen minutes) Fantastic!
From: frost_burns Date: January 13th, 2005 11:27 am (UTC) (Link)

luv ya

aw. i love you. that was awesome. i'm not like gay or anything, but i loved phantom of the opera. definitely made it better for me.
From: rainbowkingdom Date: January 13th, 2005 02:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
Just wanted to let you know that a person (nickname: ebarkle_05) posted your "Phantom in 15 Minutes" on the IMDb Phantom message board without mentioning your name and without a link back. So pobably without your permission?
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: January 13th, 2005 04:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh God, this again? I'll see if I can find it...
mysterymeg From: mysterymeg Date: January 13th, 2005 03:40 pm (UTC) (Link)


*snuggles her precious Vicomte* I love this. Carlotta as Boobzilla...bwahahaha! Okay, did anyone else yell out, "Oh my God, look at the size of that cock!" when Andre came out in his rooster costume?

Dread Pirate Roberts dancers...*applause* Very nice!

From: yesmyqueen Date: January 13th, 2005 05:27 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, just so you know, I read this in its entirety *BEFORE* seeing the movie. And during the OMGDRAMATICPASSIONDONJUANWTF scene, when the rest of the audience was watching raptly and silently, I was trying to control my hysterical laughter at the Dread Pirate Roberts Corps du Ballet. XD
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: January 13th, 2005 05:32 pm (UTC) (Link)
Really, you can't blame that on me, because my mother and I were laughing through the DPR Squad without the benefit of anyone having called it that yet. ; )
freethegayboys From: freethegayboys Date: January 13th, 2005 05:33 pm (UTC) (Link)

I saw the moie the other day, and since than have been looking forward to getting here and reading this... awesome awesome. I really loved it.

thank you for doing these... I really appreciate them, no more than anyone else does I supposed, but hey... i do all the same *high fives you*
glimmer_glass From: glimmer_glass Date: January 13th, 2005 06:09 pm (UTC) (Link)
THE PHANTOM: Christine? You came back?

CHRISTINE: I just wanted to give you the ring. You know. As a token. Of my eternal… affection. Yeah. “Affection.” And my phone number. And my forwarding address.

I've never seen the play, so I gasped when the Phantom turned around and Christine was there, with the trembling underlip of repressed lust. And then-- she gave back the ring. Heh.

Brilliant, as always!
aer_faery From: aer_faery Date: January 13th, 2005 06:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
Another amazing movie in fifteen minutes. You are truely amazing. ^_^
almosttomorocco From: almosttomorocco Date: January 13th, 2005 09:16 pm (UTC) (Link)


You're brilliant. Thanks for making me smile, I love the Movies in 15 mins.
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