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Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes - Movies in Fifteen Minutes Page 4
This is, after all, what happens when you cross the streams.
cleolinda
m15m
cleolinda
Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes

As promised: Phantom of the Opera in Fifteen Minutes. I'm still counting up the fundraising, but we'll have a final count soon. I'm already running late with the book manuscript, but this was a very quick write--it practically parodies itself, and it was fun, and a good palate cleanser.



ETA 4/02/05: Okay. I'm gonna try to be real clear about this. I really, really liked the movie. I liked the book. I have never seen the show, but I would probably like it, and I ended up really enjoying the music. I like the actors involved. PLEASE DO NOT LEAVE ME COMMENTS ABOUT MY "HATE" FOR THE MOVIE. The point of these parodies is "affectionate snark." The jokes are written with love. If I hated the movie, I wouldn't bother. If you think I'm not funny, that's one thing, but please don't leave me long screeds about how I didn't "understand" or "appreciate" the movie, because you're preaching to the choir. (Yes, I have received, and am still receiving, a lot of these. Two today alone, in fact.)

P.S. Please look up the difference between "heroin" and "heroine" before you complain about my "Heroine Addict" icons. It's a pun. It's supposed to be a positive thing. I'm not calling anyone a drug user. Thank you, and enjoy.





Oh, and since it always comes up: I never have a problem with anyone leaving comments. In fact, if you'd like, you can leave them in the comments for me to see. But please don't copy or repost the entire thing anywhere; excerpts and links are always fine, though.

ETA: Minor corrections have been made to dates and a couple of names.

OH MY GOD, HE'S SLIGHTLY UNATTRACTIVE ON ONE SIDE! TO ARMS!Collapse )



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Current Music: DUHHHHHH! DUNDUNDUNDUN DUHHHHHHH!

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wenelda From: wenelda Date: January 9th, 2005 08:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
LMAO! That's wonderful. I totally love all the "daddy issues" thing at the grave XD
onelittlevoice From: onelittlevoice Date: January 9th, 2005 08:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
pure. fabulous. awesomeness.
demonqueen666 From: demonqueen666 Date: January 9th, 2005 08:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
BWAHAHAHA!!! I just saw the movie yeterday and....gawd, this is so friggin hilarious!!
There will be icons, yes?? TELL ME THERE WILL BE ICONS!!
My fav parts:

CHRISTINE: Well, you know, my dead father said he would send me an angel, so I’ve been praying, and you know what? He did! The angel hides in my closet and sings to me!
MEG: Hon? I think you may be wrong in the head.

RAOUL: ARE YOU IN THERE WITH SOME VAMPIRE?

There, she is touched by an angel. Of music. A lot.

ANDRE: Carlotta won’t sing and Christine has gone missing and we have NO CAST.
FIRMIN: Hey, it’s all publicity, and publicity is worth its weight in naked gold women.
ANDRE: NO. CAST.

STAGEHAND: Bring out the dramatic sheep!

CHRISTINE: He really looked like my dad when we were singing about the Music of the Night and he was running his hands all over me.

THE DREAD PIRATE ROBERTS CORPS DE BALLET: *shimmies*

CHRISTINE: I just wanted to give you the ring. You know. As a token. Of my eternal… affection. Yeah. “Affection.” And my phone number. And my forwarding address.
THE PHANTOM: Go, Christine! The mob is coming!
RAOUL [throwing Christine over his shoulder]: Oh, for the love of…!
CHRISTINE [shouting back to the Phantom]: Don’t be a stranger!


*is dead from teh laughter*
rainbowjehan From: rainbowjehan Date: January 9th, 2005 08:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Oh. My. God. I love you.

*year is made*

Wherever It Is That the Dancers Hang Out

BUQUET THE STAGEHAND: …And in the book, he’s got a hole where his nose ought to be, and his hands are cold and he’s like a cadaver all over!

SOME DANCER: But what about in the movie?

BUQUET: In the movie? He’s got a terrible… third degree… SUNBURN!

THE DANCERS: *scream and faint dead away*


This was totally one of my very favourite parts, because sadly my biggest issue with the movie was that he had a nose.
jedifaerie From: jedifaerie Date: January 10th, 2005 04:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
*dies*

That was brilliant! I posted the link in my LJ :)
unconventional From: unconventional Date: January 9th, 2005 08:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
You are my hero! I was seriously thinking last night, "I hope she does a movie in 15 minutes for Phantom soon." That was so great, you totally made my day. :D
nomudblood From: nomudblood Date: January 9th, 2005 08:59 pm (UTC) (Link)
Brilliant
crinkledpaper From: crinkledpaper Date: January 9th, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Totally awesome. I haven't been able to stop laughing!
jaded_lady From: jaded_lady Date: January 9th, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
it's official...i LURVE you. i don't know..I guess i technically am a "phan"..would you reccomend seeing this? Or is it just Over-Hollywood-ized?

<3
cleolinda From: cleolinda Date: January 9th, 2005 09:20 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think I said on my journal--if you love movies that are partly good and partly so bad they are good, you will love this. If you are terribly attached to Brightman and Crawford, you will hate it. I think I'm dragging someone else to see it next weekend. : )
ekwy From: ekwy Date: January 9th, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
Heeeeh. *fangirls you like whoa* And I just came back from watching Phantom for the third time, and this was posted. Yay!

Mmm, Phantom... *drools*
theonlykow From: theonlykow Date: January 9th, 2005 09:00 pm (UTC) (Link)
I luff it. I deeply look forward to the book as I will run the fuck out and buy it the instant it comes out.
seasalts From: seasalts Date: January 9th, 2005 09:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
*dies laughing*

FANFIC WRITERS: Did someone say SLASH?

My brain has now broken from thoughts of Phantom/Raoul. You've just totally made my day. XD
onsunset From: onsunset Date: January 9th, 2005 09:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
Loves it.
mlleperian From: mlleperian Date: January 9th, 2005 09:01 pm (UTC) (Link)
OMG GENIUS!
moongazingfae From: moongazingfae Date: January 9th, 2005 09:02 pm (UTC) (Link)
You're trying to cause death by cackles, aren't you? My tummy hurts now, and everyone around must think I'm a freak...
neflhim From: neflhim Date: January 9th, 2005 09:03 pm (UTC) (Link)
That has to be the funniest thing I have read, like ever!

Oh, damn, but that rocked.
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