Tags: harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban

gof15m

Why hello there

Okay. There is so much back story to this that I'm not even sure where to start, or how to explain it without writing you a novel, but here goes:

August kicked my ass. My computer died (I am even now working on a computer shared with four other people), and I then went through a series of tribulations known as the Compocalypse, in which three different new computers refused to boot, I had to have the entire upstairs of the house rewired as a result, I still can't afford to get my data retrieved from the old computer, so on and so forth. Also, I washed my cell phone, the dishwasher started snarling at us, our dryer died twice, we ended up with $1500 worth of plumbing problems (don't even get me started on what happened to my mother's car, which was $2800), we're still paying off the air conditioner from last year--look, I can keep going if you want. My point is, I sat down and tried to figure out what I could to to earn money quickly to take care of some of this. And somehow, I came up with the idea to annotate some of the online Movies in Fifteen Minutes stuff--the print equivalent of a DVD commentary, almost--and see if y'all would be interested. Let's try the three Harry Potter ones online, those are obviously related and would yield some interesting stuff to talk about, how about that? So six weeks of footnoting later, here we are:


THE ANNOTATED MOVIES IN FIFTEEN MINUTES1
1 Wizards


$6.25 US -- £3.92 -- €4.47 -- $7.00 AU



I want to be really, really clear about this: THE PARODIES ARE OLD MATERIAL. THEY ARE ALREADY ONLINE FOR FREE. YOU HAVE ALREADY READ THEM. What you would actually be paying for is some 460 footnotes of commentary material, which you can see in the preview on Lulu. It's a simple PDF file, which was the most widely-accepted format I could find. You don't even have to care about Harry Potter; the notes talk about things like the origins of GQMFs, "dead from coke," "pastede on yay," pixel-stained technopeasants, and the color puce. You also, however, get discussion of the books, the movies, the actors, various in-jokes, Americanisms, Britishisms, internetisms, AND SO MUCH MORE. Cough.

(I let folks at my personal journal test it out earlier today before I brought it to y'all at large, and so far my favorite endorsements are "The footnotes are even more fun than the parodies" and "This shit is charming.")

(Next month I'd like to put together "(2) Vampires"--Van Helsing, Dracula, Twilight--but will probably cool it for a while after that and work on my novel and short stories. You know, the respectable stuff. So I don't intend to run this into the ground, if you're concerned about that.)

If you have any questions, and I'm sure you do, ask below and I'll work up as comprehensive a set of answers as I can manage for a post tomorrow. I'm in the final phase of working out how to sell the Kindle version and how to sell to people who can't use Lulu and/or PayPal, so hold on for that.


*stands back*


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msauvage purple

Corrections: Harry Potter

All right. For some reason it's been my policy not to go back and make additions or corrections to the Fifteen Minutes because... I dunno, I guess I'm lazy. They'll probably be revised someday anyway, and then I'll get to point out that not only are there are two full moons in one week in Van Helsing, but a gypsy princess who lives in a manor rather than... do whatever nomadic thing it is that... gypsies do.

However, I am making an exception for Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, which has now been corrected/amended:

1. Thank you, all fifty of you, for pointing out that it was Harry who got hit by the pebble, not Ron. Normally I don't care if small details are wrong, because it's a quick summary/parody, but if you fix that, there's an opportunity for a new line in the second go-round. So go back and check that out.

2. "Let me chain you." I left that wide open because I thought the porno joke was getting played (and some people have told me it already was by that point). It's not the greatest line in the world now, but there's at least something for the H/Hr people now.

3. I forgot about the origami crane. Look, I'm not a big Draco fan, much less a D/H fan, but it was a big thing, and I forgot to do anything about it. That's fixed now.

4. No, they're not going to get to play Quidditch in Goblet of Fire. Ron's bit about hearing they would get to is ambiguous, so I added something to make the irony more clear.

So. That ought to fix all the complaints and corrections. I hope.

msauvage purple

(no subject)

As a bonus: Harry Potter in Fifteen Minutes icons. Go to the movies_in_fifteen_minutes folder for the rest (again, not linking directly because I may have to change the folder name if people start hotlinking).

Want/take/have, make your own, share them, have a party. But please don't hotlink. There's about 20 total.




ETA: Most of the pictures I've used came from two sources. The "I think I directed a porno" picture that everyone wants to know about came from the "Trading Cards" section (I'm pretty sure) on this first link:

http://www.digicasey.com/PrisonerSpread.html
http://outnow.ch/Media/Img/2004/HarryPotter3/


hermione

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in Fifteen Minutes

Disclaimer and actual opinion: I thought the movie was brilliant, which means it was extremely difficult to parody, as it was already 1) good and 2) intentionally funny, so don't expect great things from this one. I’m going to warn you up front: despite—or maybe because of—being a parody of a children’s movie, this contains strong language and adult humor. Many thanks, once again, to the Movie Spoiler for invaluable help in keeping the plot straight.

ETA: Corrections and additions are listed here. If you've never read "HP & POA in Fifteen Minutes" before, don't worry about it.


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